Pollie

Pollie - Australian for politician.

None of the men who in this colony have left footprints behind them have been cold water men

Mudgee Representative Sir John Robertson, 1880s

Violent behaviour and violent language were condoned or scarcely rebuked; fights between members were not uncommon and the sight of a drunken statesman falling off his bench during a debate excited amusement rather than indignation. "Mudgee is represented by three good drinking men - myself, Sir John Robertson, and David Buchannan" young Adolphus George Taylor told his supporters soon after his election in 1882. A fews later a timid proposal that grog be banned in the Parliamentary refreshment room was easily defeated... Sir John restored the [Reform] Club to solvency by declaring to a meeting of members: "We must drink the bloody club out of debt!". 

Cyril Pearl, Wild Men of Sydney, 1958

I myself have seen you [ie Australia's First Prime Minister Edmund Barton] drunk in the legislative assembly of New South Wales... I have seen you snoring drunk on several occasions.. you have addressed audiences while under the influence of drink... when in Brisbane about a year ago you got so disgracefully drunk and incapable that medical aid had to be called in so that you could be "toned up" in time to address a big public meeting. On that occasion your condition and demeanour, the result of your drinking, so shocked some of the audience nearest the platform that they left in shame and disgust... I charge you with being very frequently under the influence of drink ever since the meeting of the federal parliment... and when you were supposed to be discharging the duties of your high constitutional office of Prime Minister.. Quite recently you came into chamber so drunk you were scarcely able to stand... on another occasion, seeing your drunken, helpless state, the Speaker generously put an end to the painful scene [when] he saw you were incapable of properly doing [so]...

Politician John Norton in an "Open Letter to Edmund Barton, Prime Minister of the Commonwealth, Concerning His Disgusting Drinking Habits", January 1902

The easygoing Australian may put up with anything. Except one thing. Don't try and tamper with his beer. The Senator who suggested weaker beer may have his eyes correctly on the dangers of alcoholism. The remedy though may not be to alter the beer but to educate the people in handling it. Any government legislating for weaker beer would be likely to be thrown out with the slops.

From Editorial in Sydney Sun Herald, 1971 

You can't cut the mustard in the Australian Bush if you can't put a beer down

John Anderson, Leader of the National Party and Deputy Prime Minister after skulling a beer for the TV, Stateline, 20 October 2001

I downed the contents of the pot in eleven seconds, left the Sconcemaster floundering, and entered the Guniness Book of Records with the fastest time ever recorded.   This feat was to endear me to some of my fellow Australians more than anything else I ever achieved.

Bob Hawke, Former Prime Minister of Australia, after drinking 2.5 pints of beer in 11 seconds, Hawke Memoirs (1994)

I interviewed him [ie Hawke] in 1984, when Britain was negotiating to sell some naval vessel or other to Australia, a deal which Hawke referred to 'the Poms trying to rip us off again'. The interview was informal - Hawke was lying on the lounge in his hotel room wearing only a pair of shorts and eating iced cherries from a bowl perched on his chest.

Phillip Knightley, Australia: A Biography of a Nation, 2000

[Former Prime Minister] 'John Curtin sober was the finest bloke alive. John Curtin drink was a vicious cur', Anstley said. Sober, certainly, I do not claim Curtin's mantle, but there is no doubt that excessive drink sometimes brought out an unpleasant personality change which, had I continued to drink, would have made me unfit to be Prime Minister.

Bob Hawke, Former Prime Minister of Australia, The Hawke Memoirs (1994)

I enjoy myself in the public bars of pubs more than anywhere else, almost.

Malcom Frazer, Former Prime Minister of Australia, 1977

I owe you a beer

Prime Minister John Howard thanking the head of the United Nations for his support in the East Timor Crisis, March 2000

[Barbie] Cooking is generally improved with a beer.

Federal Treasurer Peter Costello, Snake upstages Costello on TV, SMH, 21 July 2004

The Prime Minister, Mr Whitlam, yesterday... went behind the bar of the Emerald Star Hotel -- and personally pulled 65 free beers. Mrs Whitlam looked on slackjawed at the sight of the Prime Minister fondling a beer gun as if he had just been given it for his birthday.  Mothers with children in tow came in off the street to goggle and ship-girls stood wide-eyed in disbelief at Mr Whitlam dexterously dispensing a glowing benevolence. Not many Prime Ministers could do that, said Mrs Rene Dern, boss of the bar, nodding admiringly at the tight white heads on the beers Mr Whitlam was pulling. 'Joe Bjelke-Petersen wouldn't do it', yelled a delighted customer.

Sunday Telegraph, 1974

Any of Sir John's NSW Supreme Court colleagues could have told him [ie Gough Whitlam] about Kerr's "drinking problem"

It's time for the G-G's dismissal, Sydney Morning Herald, 9-10 March, 2002

And have a pint for me son, as I know you will.

Prime Minister John Howard in his victory speech following his election win, 2001

Former prime minister Sir John Gorton has admitted cheating on his first wife and occassionally drinking too much during his term in office.  "More important was his admission that he drank too much on occasion. There was a lot of gossip circulating in Canberra during the '60s and '70s but if half of it were true he would have been dead long ago".

Former PM admits affairs, Sunday Telegraph, March 17 2002

Federal deputy speaker Ian Causley denied being drunk while in charge of Parliament during its final marathon sitting this week. Mr Causley admitted he'd had "a couple of drinks" but told ABC Radio later he was not drunk. Earlier this week [he] was forced apologise for making a sexual suggestive remark.  According to Ms Roxon, [he] said to her as she left the chamber: "If you are having trouble having children I'm happy to participate and help you".

I wasn't tipsy, says Speaker, Sunday Telegraph, June 30, 2002

"I called him an arse-licker, which I think is a fine Australian term, and it accurately describes the Prime Minister's behaviour in Washington where he rolled over for the Americans," [Federal Politician] Mr Latham told Radio 2GB. "Well, I do share the language of my electorate, and if I find a term like that is an accurate description of the Prime Minister's behaviour in Washington, why shouldn't I use it."  Mr Latham accused his critics of creating an English upper class.

Frontbencher Latham Defiant on 'Aussie Term', News.com.au, 26 June 2002

Youngsters on an excursion to study democracy heard Lord Mayor Jim Soorley call an opposition councillor a "wanker" and a "boofhead" and tell a female councillor to "shut up, you stupid woman"  One student said the Lord Mayor needed "his mouth washed out with soap"

Clean up Your Act, Brisbane Sunday Mail, September 7, 2002

Among the epithets that have taken flight from his [ie Prime Minister Paul Keating's] tounge during the course of public debate, and are to be found gracing the pages of whatever is the Australian equivalent of Hansard, have been scumbags, pieces of criminal garbage, sleaze-perfumed gigolos, gutless spivs, boxheads, immoral cheats and stunned mullets.

Bill Bryson, Down Under, 2000

Now listen mate," [to John Browne, Minister of Sport, who was proposing a 110 per cent tax deduction for contributions to a Sports Foundation] "you're not getting 110 per cent. You can forget it. This is a fucking Boulevard Hotel special, this is. The trouble is we are dealing with a sports junkie here [gesturing towards Prime Minister Bob Hawke]. I go out for a piss and they pull this one on me. Well that's the last time I leave you two alone. From now on, I'm sticking to you two like shit to a blanket.

Paul Keating, when treasurer of Australia (he would eventually become the Prime Minister)

McLeay told Latham to his face, as well as the rest of his 91 federal Labor colleagues, something like this at Tuesday's caucus meeting: "We're told that, in government, we'll ameliorate these increases by finding savings. If you can show me a crystal ball that tells me we're absolutely certain of winning the election, rather than just listening to Newspoll, then fine. But the problem is, maybe we won't win the election, and then the poor families in my [inner-city Sydney] electorate are stuck with it forever. Bob McMullan says it's all a bit of a shit sandwich. So we're asking voters, are we, to eat this shit sandwich which might just poison their children?"

Nasty Medicine, with no sweeteners, Sydney Morning Herald, June 26, 2004

Mr Garrett said he was unsure whether he would have a role in advising on policy in the run-up to the election but that his priority was to be a good local member. "I will move to that electorate, I will work in that electorate, I will surf in that ocean and I will drink in that pub," he said.

Labor star Garrett rocky on the rolls, Sydney Morning Herald, June 12, 2004

COALITION MP Dave Tollner yesterday described the Labor rival who accused him of getting drunk and boorish on a Qantas flight as a "nancy boy". South Australian MP Rod Sawford hit back last night, branding Mr Tollner, who hails from the Northern Territory, a goose. Mr Tollner also denied drinking heavily throughout the journey.. "He ruffled my hair and I told him: 'The last bloke who did that to me had his jaw broken,' " he said.

Words fly over MP's drinking, Courier Mail, 26 May 2004

NSW deputy opposition leader Barry O'Farrell has been suspended from the parliament for two days after accusing Labor MP Peter Black of being drunk in the lower house. Mr O'Farrell told the house: "I warned the honourable member for Murray-Darling about coming into the chamber late at night and behaving in that way." Challenged as to what he meant, Mr O'Farrell responded: "What it means is that he is pissed, he should not be in the chamber drunk."

NSW deputy opposition leader barred for calling MP drunk, March 11, 2004

"Having a go at the ref, yelling abuse. It's part of the Australian way." Mr Latham, a talented schoolboy batsman, couldn't recall "flipping the bird" at an umpire while playing for Sydney University. "It's pretty hard when you've got (batting) gloves on," he said. "It was a pretty crook LB (leg before) and I let him know that and got reported ... these things happen in the nature of competitive sport." Mr Latham recalled attending World Series Cricket matches in his final year of high school. "With some mates we loaded up a plastic garbage bin ... we would have had the first garbage bin full of beers into the SCG under lights. We didn't cause any trouble that night, but others did."

Mark Latham, Leader of the Opposition, News.com.au, 16 July 2004

[Opposition leader] Mr Latham has made no secret of his love of a drink. Before winning the leadership, he was regularly spotted late at night at Canberra's bars during parliamentary sitting weeks.But Prime Minister John Howard is no wowser himself, being a long-time heavy smoker, a fan of scotch and fine wine and the host of some of the best parties in Canberra during the late 1980s.

Latham could swear off alcohol to regain health, Sydney Morning Herald, 29 August 2004

THE daughter of former federal Opposition Leader Simon Crean has been charged with being drunk in a public place. Police were called to a venue in St Kilda on Friday night after Emma Kate Crean, 20, became involved in an argument. She was then arrested and charged. A spokesman for Mr Crean dismissed the charge as being part of growing up.

Crean girl on drunk charge, Sydney Morning Herald, 29 August 2004

After all, Dave Tollner, who holds the Top End seat of Solomon for the Coalition by only 88 votes, has been controversial by any standard. Dubbed by a local newspaper as the "member for gaffes", Mr Tollner was forced to apologise to fellow MPs for his behaviour on a flight to Canberra but denied he was drunk. During a debate in Parliament he referred to two of Australia's biggest trading partners as "Japs" and "Yanks". He punched a visiting French MP in the head during a parliamentary rugby cup, admitting later, "I slipped one into him".

Dog bites mother, PM may feel pain, The Age, 23 September 2004

THE swearing mayor of Ku-ring-gai, in Sydney's north, has done it again. This time Adrienne Ryan, estranged wife of former police commissioner Peter Ryan, told a rowdy crowd of rugby players to "shut the f... up". She followed it up a little later in the evening by telling Fijian player Epi Wakaniyaro to "go back to Somalia or wherever it is you come from". The lady mayoress, who became notorious for using four-letter words in a speech to school children, made the gaffes at a rowdy function for Gordon Rugby Club.

Swear mayor does it again, SMH, October 29, 2004

On MP’s being regularly on the sauce while sitting: “I’m not aware of any such thing. But I have witnessed in my time, isolated incidents of members a bit under the weather but that has been going on for as long as I’ve been in Parliament.

Leader of the Qld Opposition Lawrence Springborg, Crikey.com.au, 5 November 2004

NSW Supreme Court judge Jeff Shaw earns $1200 a day while he seeks treatment for a drinking problem that had become obvious to his colleagues years ago. Justice Shaw's drinking has been a subject of plenty of gossip in legal and media circles since the late 1990s. "A lovely bloke, a hard worker - and a big drinker," was how one former colleague put it. Two parliamentary colleagues say Justice Shaw knew he drank too much and had tried "many times" to stop. Said another former Carr government minister who worked closely with Justice Shaw: "Did he have a drink - yeah, we all did. But I never noticed an alcohol problem".

Judge at home on $1200 a day, SMH, Nov 7 2004

A LOWER house MP threatened to punch a cabinet minister who called him a "poofter" during a fiery night in the Northern Territory Parliament.

Parliamentary brawl narrowly averted, SMH, Feb 18 2005

The only way we're going to fix this ... is to get away from this stupid culture where binge drinking, getting drunk out of our brain, is the go.

Qld Premier Peter Beatie, Beattie blasts 'stupid culture' of drunkenness, SMH, Feb 21 2005

"I think anybody who's has a few drinks and gone off to a club of some kind... my attitude is big deal... so what if he's [Future Prime Minister Kevin Rudd] had a few too many drinks"

Qld Premier Mr Beattie, Strip club visit shows Rudd is human: Beattie, Herald Sun Sunday, 19 August 2007

If this seemed slightly below the bum-crack, Labor MP Steve Gibbons was happy to destroy any semblance of decorum. As Kelly walked across the chamber to answer a question on dodgy regional grants, Gibbons's thunderous interjection echoed through the house "I suppose a rort's out of the question," he roared. Remarkably, Kelly did not hear the gibe, but her colleagues did. Tony Abbott was soon up on his feet: "It was a crude and demeaning interjection, most inappropriate on International Women's Day."

The Sketch: A hormonal day in the house, The Australian, March 9 2005

I would ... like to catch up with you ... and have a beer

Prime Minister John Howard, Steve bows out after 22 years on Today, Feb 11 2005

Mr O'Farrell today described Speaker John Aquilina as a "f---ing joke" and told him to "piss off" after two questions by Opposition Leader John Brogden were ruled out of order.

MP to Speaker: 'F--- off', Sydney Morning Herald, 24 March 2005

The Opposition's defence spokesman, Robert McClelland, said the judgement did not point to any weaknesses in the anti-terrorism laws. "I think what we've seen is the jury having the task of deciding whether this bloke was a ratbag rather than a terrorist," he said. "Essentially they've said the former."

Not a terrorist, just an angry loner starved of attention, SMH, April 2005

FORMER Labor leader Mark Latham has attacked Premier Peter Beattie as "an A-grade arsehole" for destabilising his leadership last year and blasted the Labor Party as hopeless and beyond repair. ...[In response] Mr Beattie said. "He's not the first person to call me that (an arsehole) and he won't be the last."

Beattie makes Latham A-list, The Courier Mail, 29 June 2005

WOLLEMI pines have survived for 200 million years, so two months in the office of Premier Peter Beattie should have been a breeze. But the prehistoric pine, dubbed the jurassic or dinosaur tree, wilted under all that hot air. Experts from the Department of Primary Industries took the Premier's pine away for some TLC this week and gave him a new one – with strict instructions on how to keep it alive. "I'm not surprised it has started to droop after having to listen to all my crap," Mr Beattie said.

Pete's hot air wilts wollemi, The Sunday Mail, 17 July 2005

Liberal backbencher Bob Baldwin said he personally called almost everyone mate and treated the word as a badge of honour. "I think that people should get off their high horse and take a reality check," Mr Baldwin said. "I have never seen anything so criminal in all my life. It's part of the Australian vernacular. It's a term of endearment and of mateship." Fellow Liberal backbencher Mal Washer said use of the word 'mate' could be offensive in the wrong context. "It's the way you say it," Dr Washer said. "It can be disrespectful – it's probably wiser to use some other way to address people.

Banned from saying 'mate', News.com.au, August 18 2005

"It's pomposity gone mad," Former Prime Minister Bob Hawke said. "It's not surprising. In a sense we're living in an age where the concept of mateship has been damaged to a fairly large extent by a lot of the approaches of this government. "It is a great part of Australian culture that we do call each other mate," said federal Labor leader Kim Beazley. "That (Parliament House) is a palace of democracy, not the palace of imperial Rome." Asked if he minded being called mate in Parliament House, Mr Beazley replied "I insist on it".

What the politicians say, SMH, August 19 2005

Saturday morning. Journalist Tony Wright is relaxing at home with his 13-year-old daughter when the phone rings. Prime Minister Keating is on the line. “You’re a c*** who’s gone and tittle-tattled on a private conversation,” Keating shouts. Wright had been abused once too often by Keating. He snaps. “Listen, mate,” says Wright. “You’re the fucking c***! If I was going to leak your private conversation, I would have written it myself, not given it to another journalist.” Keating’s tone changes. He becomes more conciliatory. When the conversation ends, Wright’s daughter is hiding beneath her father’s desk. “Dad, are we in trouble?” she asks “Why would we be in trouble?” “Because you just called the prime minister a fucking c***.”

Dog days, The Bulletin, 24 August 2005

A Friday afternoon. Journalist Randall Markie is sitting at his desk in parliament house writing a column for The West Australian. The phone rings. The PM’s secretary says: “Randall, the PM would like a chat.” A few moments later, Keating’s voice breaks in: “I’d like you just to tell me one thing: do you work at being a fuckwit, or does it just come naturally?” Markie is stunned; nothing in his training has told him what to do when the prime minister calls you that ... “It’s always better to act naturally!” he responds. It’s enough: a smart-arse answer is the last thing Keating expects. So begins what Markie will recall as “a huge serve”, a 30-second non-stop spewing of profanities. Then he says goodbye and hangs up. Another day in the Keating prime ministership.

Dog days, The Bulletin, 24 August 2005

John Brogden's future as state Opposition Leader is under a cloud after he was forced to apologise for an alcohol-fuelled night during which he pinched one journalist's bottom, propositioned another and referred to Bob Carr's wife as a "mail-order bride". Mr Brogden said last night his behaviour was unacceptable and he would call the journalists and Helena Carr to apologise.

My foolish, boozy night: Brogden tells, SMH, 29 August 2005

AN intoxicated Andrew Peacock failed 11 times to provide police with a breath sample before being put in a caged truck and charged with drink-driving, police will claim today. After submitting to a 12th test, the former Liberal leader allegedly returned a blood alcohol reading of .08 after he crashed his Mercedes Benz at Edgecliff last month. Officers claim that when they got Mr Peacock back to the station, his speech was slurred, he was unsteady on his feet and he had to be helped by police.

Former Liberal leader blew .08: claim, News.com.au, 14 September 2005

FORMER ALP leader Mark Latham had such a dislike and distrust of his colleague Kevin Rudd that he decided in April last year not to make Mr Rudd his foreign minister if Labor won the election. "Rudd is a terrible piece of work," Mr Latham wrote on April 20 of the potential future leader. "If he grew up in poverty in rural Queensland where did the posh accent come from?"

Mark his words, Rudd's a turkey on foreign affairs, News.com.au, 15 September 2005

Whatever happened to Labor's knock-around culture? It has been sucked dry by the self-conscious careerists – Smith, Swan, Beazley, McMullan, Macklin, Faulkner, Ray et al. We have too many Christian-icon collectors, bushwalkers and trivia buffs and not enough drinkers/punters.

Mark Latham, April 28 1999

"At one stage, he even gave me a burst about Richard Butler, the recently dismissed Tasmanian governor: 'You were complaining about Butler's payout, but do you know why I had to sack him? Do you know what really happened? He got pissed at the wedding and carried on, that's why he had to go'," Mr Latham wrote.

Butler no comment on drunk claims, News.com.au, 25 September 2005

Lunch at Bob Hawke and Blanche's place: a multi-storey mansion on Middle Harbour with a separate unit/meeting space down below on the water. Hawke offered this to me for 'secret meetings - you can come in here on a water taxi'. He must think I'm James Bond or something. I politely declined his offer. An amiable enough lunch and conversation, more workman-like than warm. These two are tightly focused on money, far more than Janine and me. I suppose you don't end up in a posh joint like this otherwise. I kept on thinking about Chifley's house in Bathurst and Curtin's in Cottlesloe. Yes, we have changed too much as a Party. Maybe I'm the odd man out these days, but I dislike wealth on this scale. Hawke was a legend when I first joined the Party 25 years ago. Is this why it is so hard to have a normal conversation with him. I can't stop grinning when I look at him, thinking of the great story Ralph Willis tells from the early 1970s. Ralph was a research officer at the ACTU and Hawke was President. One day an announcement came through at around lunchtime that Hawke was Australia's Father of the Year, so Bob grabbed his mates and went to the pub to celebrate. Ten hours later it was Ralph's job to haul him out of the pub, get him into a car and take him home. Ralph dropped him, full as a boot, on the doorstep as Hazel came out the front and gave him both barrels, calling him every name under the sun. Ralph drove away thinking to himself, 'There's Australia's Father of the Year'.

The Latham Diaries

Disgraced Nationals MP Andrew Fraser has denied being drunk after being suspended from the NSW Parliament for eight days for assaulting Roads Minister Joe Tripodi. "No, I wasn't drunk; no, I wasn't anywhere near intoxicated,'' he said. "If [the Government] wants to make those implications I'd suggest they have a good look at their own back bench, have a good look at some of their members and just see who does do the drinking down here.''

I wasn't drunk, says suspended MP, SMH, 19 October 2005

The National Party leader, Andrew Stoner, has come under fire after it was revealed he had been drinking with Andrew Fraser before the MP assaulted the Roads Minister, Joe Tripodi, in Parliament.

MP was in the bar before scuffle, SMH, 20 October 2005

We could have had the same with Kerr and, of course, Kerr was on his list. And so I thought "I'll approach that". And the [Governor General] appointment was welcomed on all sides, because he deteriorated in the job. His wife died and he got onto grog again.

Former PM Gough Whitlam, 7.30 Report, 10 November 2005

THE Premier was forced into an embarrassing apology last night after he was caught describing the new chief executive of the Cross City Tunnel as a "f---wit". As the nation's premiers waited for the Prime Minister to attend a news conference for the Council of Australian Governments meeting in Canberra, Victoria's Steve Bracks had casually asked Mr Iemma: "Any issues at home in NSW?" Mr Iemma, looking relaxed and jovial, replied: "Today, um, well this f---wit is the new CEO of the Cross City Tunnel and has been saying, 'Oh, well, what controversy? There is no controversy.' "

Tunnel boss feels Premier's road rage, SMH, Feb 11 2006

PREMIER Peter Beattie has admitted he regularly swears in private... Television cameras captured Mr Beattie leaning over and telling New South Wales Premier Morris Iemma: "She's Deputy Premier and Treasurer and every other piece of s--t I don't want." [Mr Beattie justified this by saying:] "I am an Australian like everybody else. I swear... Australians swear. It is a fact of life. We have been swearing since the Diggers of World War I."

Beattie becomes swearing Premier #2, The Sunday Mail, 12.2.06

Former health minister Michael Wooldridge dismissed a voter as a "nitwit loser" in 1999 and later branded the same man "a puffed-up little Pom with a permed hairdo". Paul Harley-Green, 71, had sent a fax advising Dr Wooldridge to "Keep away from my letterbox in future, fart-face."

Lesbian poet fires up MP Turnbull, News.com.au, May 16 2006

During Parliament on Monday 22 May, Peter Costello made a derogatory reference to Duncan Kerr, the Member for Denison in Tasmania. In a dismissive and evasive answer to a question about Ministerial Arrangements from Mr Kerr, the Acting Prime Minister snidely called him a "dropkick". This term is an abbreviation of the full expression "dropkick and punt", which is rhyming slang for a rather nasty four-letter word not used in genteel conversation. The Speaker, who spends most of his time allowing harassment of Opposition members, did not ask Costello for a retraction, thus giving tacit approval for this type of language to be used in the House. Hansard of the day reported Costello's remarks on page 21. Because Costello was Acting PM at the time, this incident should reflect badly on his aspirations to hold such high office. The future moral tone of the House has been brought into question by this type of language being directed against a fellow member.

Crikey.com.au, 25 May 2006

A SOUTH Australian Government MP has apologised for swearing at a fellow politician in an alcohol-fuelled attack in the private members' lounge of Parliament House. The attack last week was witnessed by anti-drugs independent MP Ann Bressington, who said one MP called another a "f..king c..t" in the "unprovoked" altercation. Ms Bressington also alleged another government MP was "blind drunk", and she demanded an end to the culture of late-night boozing in the parliament. "I've worked in hotels and front bars," said Ms Bressington. "People will say, 'She's a zealot and a morals prohibitionist' but that's not where I'm coming from. This was absolutely disgusting behaviour." But another MP present, who would not be identified, played down the event, saying: "What happens in the bar should stay in the bar."

Drunk MPs keep spat in-house, The Australian, 28 June 2006

NORTHERN Territory deputy parliamentary Speaker Len Kiely is under pressure to resign amid serious allegations of sexual harassment. A female security guard at the cricket match between Australia A and Pakistan A at Marrara's TIO Stadium on July 11 has filed a complaint with the NT Government that Mr Kiely made several inappropriate remarks after being refused alcohol in an official NT Government corporate box paid for by the taxpayer. Among the remarks Mr Kiely is alleged to have made to the security guard was, "I have a very long tongue and I could use it on you and make you a very happy woman".He allegedly made the remark after being told by the security guard that he could not have another six-pack of beer after last drinks had been called. Mr Kiely also allegedly asked the security guard, in reference to another person in the corporate box he liked, "Did she give (oral sex) or had she given them up since she stopped (masturbating)?" The Sanderson MLA and up to seven other people spent last Tuesday in a corporate box at the cricket where 100 stubbies of Crown lager were consumed, say the security guard and witnesses..

Parliamentary speaker 'harassed guard', Sydney Morning Herald, 14 July 2006

BANKSTOWN MP Tony Stewart resigned as parliamentary secretary for police yesterday after he was caught drink-driving... Two years ago Mr Stewart launched a major government advertising campaign warning against drink-driving. At the time he praised the campaign that showed the effects alcohol had on the brain.

Drink-driving MP loses post, Sydney Morning Herald, 17 September 2006

A TASMANIAN Liberal MP has apologised to Parliament for referring to Premier Paul Lennon as a "brain-damaged, alcohol-addicted thug".

Liberal MP sorry for 'thug' remark, News.com.au, November 2 2006

Narrator: Despite the conflict and turmoil of politics some things in Doug Anthony's life never changed. At Christmas he would step in as acting Prime Minister, but the family holidays still came first. For a few weeks each year the country was run from the Anthony's caravan on the coast. Larry Anthony: We didn't even have a telephone, he refused to have one, so the calls would have to go through to the corner store and the lady from the corner store would have to come 'round and knock at all hours of the day saying 'Mr Anthony could you please call the prime minister', so then Doug would have to go 'round to the Public telephone box and queue up with the others with his 20 cent slots to ring whoever, so this charade went on for years. Doug Anthony: But the country ran well I, I always say to myself well it's never better [laughs]. But uh...it almost brought the nation down to a, a festival atmosphere. The nation sort of relaxed after all the tense period of living uh.. and getting ready for Christmas that here the nation was relaxing too with me in the caravan running the country.

ABC, Dynasties, 14 December 2004

A self-described underdog in the seat of Ballina, held very firmly by National incumbent Don Page, Mr Smith says he wanted to do something unique for his campaign but also do something that represented the traditional Aussie values. “Election campaigns can be sometimes boring and frustrating to the typical voter,” he said... “I love sitting around and enjoying the occasional beer with my mates and I felt that it would be a great idea if I could do the same with the Ballina electorate. I think Don Chipp, the founder of The Democrats, would have loved this idea. “We reckon that had Mark Latham employed the same tactics in 2004, we’d be under a Labor government right now.”

Free beer offered by Democrats candidate, Ballina Information Blog, collected 27 March 2007

He [former PM John Gordon] dug women and was fond of a drink, inspiring the euphemism "Gorton's flu" in reference to a hangover, and is generally remembered as "a knockabout bloke with the larrikin streak, his scarred features and crumpled suits, his candid approach and laconic air, jaunty grin, tousled hair and ever-present cigarette."

The Politics of Cool, Sydney Morning Herald, 28 March 2007

The other critical barrier is our well-entrenched grog culture -- even the National Alcohol Strategy refers to our love of “getting p-ssed”. It’s not politically smart to be labelled a wowser. It might also be rather uncomfortable for politicians and other powerbrokers to examine their own drinking.

Alcohol II: no government wants to be a wowser, Crikey.com.au, 22 May 2007

"PK said when he was out of office he planned to have an answering machine with the message: 'You have reached the office of ex-prime minister Paul Keating. Now f*** off and leave me alone'," Campbell wrote.

I'll teach you how to handle Murdoch: Keating, Sydney Morning Herald, July 10 2007

A new biography on Australia's second-longest serving Prime Minister reveals Mr Howard was deeply affected by his 1989 loss to Andrew Peacock, breaking down in a tearful apology to staff and sometimes drinking too much. "Without the responsibility of a leadership role, Howard would on occasion drink more heavily than he should," the book, John Winston Howard : A Life by Peter van Onselen and Wayne Errington, says. On one occasion, after over-indulging at a farewell dinner for a close friend in 1990, Mr Howard admitted entering the chamber drunk. "I had a couple of South Australian reds ... I remember that night, yes. I can't dispute the story," he told the authors.

Howard: 'I was drunk at work', News.com.au, 25 July 2007

Opposition Leader Kevin Rudd has admitted visiting a New York strip club during a drunken night while representing Australia at the United Nations. Mr Rudd issued a statement to News Limited on Saturday, confirming he went to the club but could not recall the events of the evening because he "had too much to drink".

Rudd 'admits visit to strip club in NY', Sydney Morning Herald, 19 August 2007

Marie Coleman, from the National Foundation for Australian Women said it appeared [Opposition Leader] Mr Rudd had been "pissed as a newt", which didn't excuse his behaviour but meant it was reasonable to give him the benefit of the doubt that it was out of character.

Contrite Rudd accuses Downer of dirty tactics, The Age, 20 August 2007

"I [Warren Snowdon, Northern Territory MP] had been drinking, and I had quite a bit to drink," he said. "But I wasn't as drunk as Kevin and I have recollections from inside the club."

'I was not as drunk as Kev", Herald Sun, 20 August 2007

KERRY O'BRIEN: But you're quite emphatic that you can't recall seeing any lap dancers performing that night?

KEVIN RUDD: I can say that I have no recollection whatsoever of me doing anything inappropriate that night. I have no recollection of seeing much beyond what you'd see in your average Australian pub over the last 20 years and I remember us leaving fairly soon. This is four years ago too, Kerry, I've got to say.

KERRY O'BRIEN: I think you'd remember if you'd never seen lap dancers before in your life, I think you'd remember that unless you were to put it mildly, blotto?

KEVIN RUDD: Well, as I've been very direct with you, I'd had too many drinks. I can't be anymore explicit than that.

[Soon to be PM] Kevin Rudd talks about his night in a New York strip club, 7.30 Report, 20 August 2007

Former prime minister Malcolm Fraser's wife, Tamie, has spoken out about the mystery of her husband turning up in the foyer of a seedy Memphis hotel. Mr Fraser has always refused to comment on how he wound up in 1986 in the hotel popular with drug dealers and prostitutes, wearing nothing but a towel and a confused expression... Mrs Fraser tells author Susan Mitchell she does not believe her husband spent the night with a prostitute, but would not have been particularly bothered if he had.

Fraser's wife speaks out about Memphis hotel mystery, Brisbane Times, 25 August 2007

Algester MP Karen Struthers has been banned from driving for 10 months after being caught drunk behind the wheel of her government car... The court heard Struthers blew 0.169 - more than three times the legal limit... Struthers had been at a boozy gathering with family and friends...

Drink driving MP loses licence for 10 months, Brisbanetimes.com.au, 28 August 2007

Deputy Prime Minister Mark Vaile said he.. liked to make a barbecue dish known as ``VB chicken'' and involving a beer can.

Mark Vaile's recipe for fruit cake, The Courier Mail, November 9 2007

THE Nationals newly appointed Deputy Leader Nigel Scullion has admitted that being stripped to his underpants and handcuffed to a pole in a Russian nightclub was "one of the best nights of his life". Mr Scullion headed an Australian delegation to a national fisheries conference in St Petersburg in 1998 - before entering politics. "It was 10 years ago, but I still remember it - I'm not someone who gets so drunk I can't remember," he said. "I was out drinking with some international fishing mates of mine back when I was a fisherman myself. If you ever get an offer to go drinking with Icelandic whalers and Canadian crab fishermen, take them up on it."
He described the night out as a "big get together with mates."

It was one of the best night of my life, says Scullion, News.com.au, December 12 2007

"My highest score was 11 not out," the Prime Minister [Kevin Rudd] told the ABC cricket commentator Jim Maxwell. "I played country C-grade cricket for two seasons before I was told I should pursue a new career." That career took him to China, where he recalled representing Australia against cricket-playing diplomats from the Indian, Pakistani and British embassies at the Temple of Heaven ground in Beijing. "It was a lot of fun and occasionally we had the odd libation [drink]," he said.

For our PMs, there's just no avoiding the follow-on, December 28, 2007


[MP] TROY Buswell knew his dream to lead the WA Liberals was in tatters after allegations about his conduct with a woman at Parliament were put to him on Friday. Perth newspaper The Sunday Times dropped a bombshell on Mr Buswell at 4.27pm, with damaging details about his drunken night in parliament on October 23 last year. Less than an hour later, the deputy Liberal leader told other media he was "not ready" to lead the party. The newspaper understands that on October 23, Mr Buswell was in the chambers of Speaker of the Legislative Assembly, Fred Riebeling, at Mr Riebeling's invitation, with a group of people including a female Labor staffer. "He performed a 'party trick' and put his hand behind her back and snapped open her bra strap," a parliamentary source said.

Bra strap trick pinches pollie, News.com.au, 13 Jan 2008

[Federal] TREASURER Wayne Swan has admitted to a bit of a wild youth, revealing he had an earlier marriage, smoked dope and his second wife was pregnant when they married. News of his past came via university friends spoken to by Brisbane's Courier-Mail newspaper as part of profile of the Treasurer. Mr Swan confirmed that he smoked marijuana during his student years... "I am just a pretty normal Queenslander", [said the Treasurer].

Treasurer admits to being a wild Swan, News.com.au, 2 March 2008

Binge drinking is such a popular issue at the moment that it has generated a brand new noun. "I'm just here for a spot of binge," said the Liberal politician I ran into this week at a Canberra bar. "Another glass of binge?" a journalist colleague had offered, courteously...

Glass of binge the order of the day, Sydney Morning Herald, March 15 2008

WEST Australian Liberals have rallied behind their leader despite his admission he sniffed the chair of a female party staffer...Mr Buswell has previously admitted to snapping a Labor staffer's bra at a drunken party trick and has been accused by retiring Liberal MP Katie Hodson-Thomas of making sexist remarks to her... "Troy is an eminently qualified person to be the next premier of Western Australia,'' Mr Collier [Liberal education spokesman] said. Liberal spokeswoman for women's interests, Helen Morton, said she was not happy about the chair sniffing but did not think it would alienate women voters.

Weeping leader confesses to chair-sniffing, News.com.au, 29 April 2008

"We finished the meeting [with a constituent]. I walked the bloke downstairs and out of Parliament and when I got back I walked into the room to pick up my notepad from the desk and Buswell started grabbing the chairs going 'Aahww, which one did you sit in? I'll be able to tell,' " she said. "And then he picked them up and started sniffing them and groaning and making sexually satisfying noises. I went: 'You're sick, knock it off', and grabbed my staff and walked out, but he didn't pay attention to a word I said."

New stink over chair sniffer, Brisbane Times, 6 May 2008

Opposition Leader Brendan Nelson also warned against becoming a nation of wowsers in attempts to curb the excesses of alcohol.

Nelson warns against becoming wowsers, The Courier Mail, April 30 2008

[NSW Treasurer] MICHAEL COSTA stormed across the room - his face flushed, his hands clenched - towards John Robertson, the secretary of Unions NSW. "You blokes can get f---ed," he screamed. "You're going to look like dickheads on Monday morning."

Costa's obscene outburst at unions, Sydney Morning Herald, May 5 2008

West Australian Premier Alan Carpenter has angrily called for a fellow Labor MP to put an end to claims that he lifted her top during a karaoke night four years ago. Labor MP Jaye Radisich today again refused to publicly deny claims that Mr Carpenter exposed her bra at the karaoke party, held at Bunbury's Sanctuary Golf Resort in 2004.

WA premier at centre of karaoke 'assault' claim, Brisbane Times, May 6 2008

[NSW Education Minister] Mr Della Bosca reacted angrily to being photographed on a bicycle after being stripped of his driver's licence for his seventh speeding fine in just over a year. Riding to parliament in shorts, hoodie top and St George rugby league socks, John Della Bosca was yesterday reported to have shouted at a photographer from The Daily Telegraph: "Get a real job you f****** c***!".

Education Minister sorry for potty mouth, Herald Sun, May 15 2008

EMBATTLED West Australian Opposition Leader Troy Buswell, who has admitted sniffing a female colleague's chair and snapping another's bra strap, has been accused of squeezing an MP's testicles.

Troy Buswell accused of grabbing MP's testicles, News.com.au, 17 May 2008

WEST Australian Energy Minister Fran Logan yesterday confirmed he was asked to leave an ABC party for being drunk, amid revelations that he asked a former female staffer to have a threesome with him... Premier Alan Carpenter, himself embroiled in allegations he lifted the shirt of a female MP in 2004, did not respond to the latest claims to surface... Sources at the function in December 2006 told The Australian that Mr Logan was "two sheets to the wind" and "smashed" when he attended the ABC news function at The Vic Hotel on December 15, 2006, having already been at the Premier's media drinks at the Perth Zoo. "He was paying special attention to some of the younger reporters," one said. "It was not proper behaviour for a minister of the Crown."

'Threesome' minister ordered to leave event, News.com.au, 26 May 2008

[Federal opposition leader] Dr Nelson expanded his attack on the Government's alcohol policies, criticising proposed guidelines setting the limit for low-risk drinking at four standard drinks. "The average fair dinkum Australian would have to ask himself how it is that four middies of beer can be classified as binge drinking."

Nelson calls time on booze tax, Sydney Morning Herald, 17 June 2008

[NSW Police Minister] Mr Brown said he had been celebrating in his office after the state's Budget sittings when the incident happened... Mr Brown denied allegations that he straddled the breasts of Wollongong MP Noreen Hay at the party, and called out to her daughter, "Look at this, I'm titty-f***ing your mother."

Police minister Matt Brown quits after underwear dance lie, News.com.au, September 11 2008

State Liberal Party Opposition Leader Isobel Redmon... candidly confesses to passing out in an Adelaide Oval corporate box toilet after...too many wines

What the %@#*? Libs leader Isobel Redmond bans swearing, Adelaide Now, 26 July 2009

There is a great yarn about prime minister John Gorton boarding a VIP plane in Melbourne one night after a very boozy official dinner. He fell asleep, was woken a while later by the noise of the engines, and vomited. As a flight attendant cleaned up, the apologetic PM asked if she was surprised an old fighter pilot like him would still get airsick. Yes, she said -- particularly since the plane had not yet taken off.

Plenty of odd moments onboard the PM's RAAF VIP flight, Herald Sun, April 11 2009

I'm not a wowser. I think people should be allowed to go out to party and have a drink and some good times with their friends.

Prime Minister Kevin Rudd, PM urges a harder line on pub, club hours, News.com.au, 4 September 2009

I’m no wowser. I drink and most Australians drink...

Steve Fielding, Family First Senator, Our drunk nation, The Punch, 27 August 2009

[Prime Minister] KEVIN Rudd has launched another expletive-laden tirade -- this time directed at Labor's factional bosses, including three female MPs... According to sources present, Mr Rudd said: "I don't care what you f---ers think!" He then went on, singling out Senator David Feeney declaring, "You can get f---ed", before asking, "Don't you f---ing understand?"

PM Kevin Rudd swears at MPs over allowances, News.com.au, September 20 2009

A SENIOR politician handed a government minister a gold watch and a jar of petroleum jelly in parliament and implied the timepiece should be shoved where the sun doesn't shine..

MP presents minister with watch and jar of lubricant, News.com.au, 22 October 2009

''Our safety is not at risk, mate, but our comfort sure is,'' [Federal Opposition leader] Mr Abbott declared before springing into action... With the light fading, the chopper couldn't land but could drop some supplies. ''Beer, water, food and rugs. Especially beer,'' quipped the Opposition Leader.

Up Fossil Creek without a clue, SMH.com.au, March 4 2010

[Federal opposition leader] TONY Abbott missed the key economic vote of the new Parliament - the $42 billion fiscal stimulus package - because he fell asleep after a night of drinking witnessed by MPs from both sides of Parliament.

Tony Abbott slept through key vote, The Daily Telegraph, March 8, 2009